Surfing On a Battle Ax


(Context; single player campaign. Player made “joke” character, an elf fighter, who is not taking the mission seriously at all to DM’s frustration.)

DM: You approach the beach. You see people enjoying the waves and having a good time.

Player: I wanna surf on my battle ax!

DM:  *facepalm* … that battle ax will not support your weight on the waves.

Player: I’m still going to try!

DM: Okay, roll a d20. If you can get a natural 20, you can surf on your battle ax.

*rolls a fucking natural 20*